7.06.2005

no quarter

1. today,
i thought suddenly of katie
(that is her name)
and the camp necklaces
we’d been comparing
in that picture.
i wondered where that necklace’d
gone, and where that picture’d
gone, and where katie’d
gone. i wondered if she’d
found a boy who made her happy,
or if she’d
become addicted to something
worldly, sinful (but somehow
soothing, smoothing). then,

2. later today,
i thought suddenly of another
friend i do not want to leave
and the song “
no quarter
we’d listened to
in the car, that time.
i wondered what kind of friend i’d
been, and what kinds of marks’d
been left, and if he’d
leave, too–you know, if he
had to. i thought yes. i wondered if that’d
make me sleep softer tonight, or if it'd
make me revel in my addictions
(forgetting, forthright, but
somehow foreign).


afterward

tonight,
i’ll think suddenly of katie
(yes, that is her name)
and necklaces;
i’ll think suddenly of that friend
and addictions;
closing the door and putting out the light,
i’ll think suddenly of
the path
where no one goes
.
i think suddenly: she will

not be home tonight.

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